How Self-Awareness and Identity Bridge the Gap to Success

Self-Awareness and Leadership Identity

Leadership is often described as a journey, and like any journey, it requires a clear map and compass. That compass is self-awareness, and the map is your leadership identity. Both are vital for navigating the complexities of leadership, especially in high-pressure environments.

Earlier this year, I completed a 20-week Coaching Leaders Through Crisis programme with Animas. One recurring theme stood out in every session, whether delivered by an academic or an executive coach: the pivotal role of self-awareness. It became clear that to lead effectively, particularly in challenging circumstances, investing time in understanding yourself is non-negotiable.

Astrid Korin shared a quote during one of the sessions that has stayed with me:"95% of us believe we are self-aware, but only 15% actually are. On an average day, up to 90% of us are lying to ourselves—about ourselves."— Tasha Eurich

I’ve always considered myself reflective, the kind of person who devours leadership books and articles in search of fresh insights. (My friends used to tease me about skipping best-selling fiction for another deep dive into leadership theories.) But when life threw a series of personal and professional crises my way, reflection took on a new level of importance. I found myself at a crossroads, grappling with questions I’d avoided for years.

Through this period, Rising Strong by Brené Brown became a lifeline. Her work helped me understand the importance of owning my story, embracing vulnerability, and deeply exploring who I was—not just as a leader, but as a person. That process was transformative and is one I now guide others through in my coaching practice.

What Are Self-Awareness and Leadership Identity?

Self-awareness is, simply put, your understanding of your own character, emotions, and behaviours.

Leadership identity builds on this by answering: Who am I as a leader? It encompasses your core values, strengths, behaviours and unique style—shaping how you inspire others, make decisions, and respond to challenges. It’s rooted in authenticity and purpose, reflecting your vision, impact, and connection to the context you serve.

Why Leadership Identity Matters

Jerry Colonna’s powerful insight captures the essence of why leadership identity is crucial:

"A leader who has not taken the time to unpack personal baggage and examine their own life cannot lead clearly. [...] They risk twisting the culture of their organisation, turning colleagues into two-dimensional players in their private little theatre."

Knowing your leadership identity goes far beyond self-reflection; it’s a cornerstone of effective, authentic leadership. Here’s why it matters:

1. Preparing for Challenges and Managing Stress

   
   

   Leadership often brings high-pressure situations. Being aware of your triggers and stressors equips you to navigate these moments with grace and composure. For instance, if you know public speaking stresses you, you can develop techniques to calm your nerves, ensuring that you communicate effectively under pressure. This self-awareness enables you to model resilience and steadiness for your team.

   
   

2. Maximising Strengths and Aligning Work Styles

   
   

   Self-awareness allows you to understand how you work best. Some leaders thrive in structured environments with clear routines, while others excel in fast-paced, dynamic settings. Knowing this helps you align your work to suit your strengths, such as scheduling creative work during your most energised hours. Over time, this alignment not only increases productivity but also sustains your energy and enthusiasm.

   
   

3. Strategic Personal Development

   
   

   Leadership isn’t static—it’s a continuous journey of growth. By understanding your leadership identity, you can intentionally focus on areas for improvement while leveraging your strengths. For example, if you’re a visionary leader but struggle with detail-oriented tasks, you might focus on improving delegation skills while continuing to inspire your team with big-picture thinking.

   
   

4. Improved Interpersonal Relationships

   
   

   Leadership is relational. Self-awareness helps you understand how your behaviour impacts others, fostering empathy, trust, and collaboration. For example, recognising that you’re quick to make decisions might help you slow down and create space for others’ input, strengthening team cohesion and respect.

   
   

5. Clarity and Confidence in Decision-Making

   
   

   When you’re clear on your values and leadership identity, decision-making becomes easier. You have a guiding framework for weighing options and navigating complex situations. For instance, if one of your values is fairness, you’ll prioritise transparency and equity in team dynamics, even when it’s challenging.

   
   

6. Adaptable Leadership and Growth

   
   

   Understanding your leadership identity allows you to adapt your approach to different situations while staying true to your authentic self. This adaptability fosters inclusivity and ensures your leadership remains effective across diverse teams and contexts. Additionally, knowing yourself opens the door to meaningful growth. By identifying areas where you’d like to improve, you can intentionally develop new skills and work toward becoming the leader you aspire to be. For instance, learning to give more effective feedback could enhance team performance and create a culture of continuous improvement.

How to Develop and Understand Your Leadership Identity

1. Prioritise Reflection and Learning

   
   

   Carve out time to reflect on your leadership journey. Journaling, reading, listening to podcasts, and seeking feedback are all valuable tools. Consider personality profiling tools such as DISC and Myer-Briggs Type Indicator Assessments. A coach can also help you gain deeper insights.

   
   

2. Embrace a Growth Mindset

   
   

   Be open to making mistakes and learning from them. Create a culture where colleagues feel safe to provide honest feedback—it will help you see yourself more clearly.

   
   

3. Stay True to Your Values

   
   

   Once you’ve identified your values, align your actions with them. Consistency builds trust and strengthens your self-confidence as a leader.

Questions to Define Your Leadership Identity

Defining your leadership identity requires intentional reflection. Here are four powerful questions to guide you:

1. What Are Your Values, and How Are They Demonstrated in Your Leadership Behaviour?

   
   

   Your values are the foundation of your leadership. Reflect on how they shape your decisions and actions. For example, if one of your core values is integrity, do you consistently model honesty and transparency with your team?

   
   

2. What Three Events in Your Life Have Been Most Significant in Shaping the Leader You Are Today?

   
   

   Our experiences profoundly influence our leadership style. Consider moments that challenged or inspired you—perhaps a mentor who believed in you, a project that tested your limits, or a failure that taught you resilience.

   
   

3. What Are Your Three Key Leadership Strengths?

   
   

   Identifying your strengths helps you understand where you naturally excel. Perhaps you’re a great motivator, a visionary strategist, or someone who fosters psychological safety.

   
   

4.      If You Could Develop in One Area as a Leader, What Would It Be, and What Difference Would It Make to You and Your Team?

Growth is a lifelong journey. Choosing one area to develop could unlock new potential, for example, learning to manage conflict more effectively could transform your team dynamics and productivity.

A Personal Leadership Journey

Leadership identity is deeply personal. It’s shaped by your values, experiences, and the ups and downs of your life story. Knowing and embracing your whole self—as a leader and as a person—can lead to greater fulfilment and help you become the leader you aspire to be.

If this resonates with you, I’d love to support your journey. Through coaching, I help leaders build self-awareness, clarify their leadership identity, and align their actions with their aspirations.

I’m Tamara, a former Executive Headteacher, qualified leadership coach, and trainer. I help purpose-driven leaders bridge the delta between where they are and where they want to be. Let’s work together to unlock your potential.